One.

Where is here? Why are you here? Here, asleep in a broken down trash compactor with some slimy tentacle as a roommate. You’re stuck here, so make the best of it. At first look it appears here is a far flung galaxy that you’re sure is the origin for an old sci-fi movie back on Earth. Well, you don’t truly know about that, but it really does smell awful down here and that is certain. Nessie doesn’t mind, (What else do you call a tentacle?) but he’s supposed to be here, eating things that the compactor can’t compact quick enough. You’ve been here, what? Maybe three hours now, your possessions in a dusty doctor’s bag that kept your old clown makeup. None of that is in the bag, not even your nose. That was a good nose. Instead dumping everything out and putting in a note from the previous employer, the freebies from the hotel you were last at, including a book of matches, cheap pen, pair of drinking glasses, an ashtray, soap, shampoo, conditioner, a used toothbrush, toothpaste, thread and needle, and a bath towel. You also raided the fridge of all the liquor. There’s that bible too. The instructions mentioned getting the bible in the room. You open it up and out falls a business card with a foreign looking name etched in it and the bible itself is hollowed out with an external hard drive with the name "Missy" written on it.

Stuck here, perhaps forever, maybe following directions wasn’t the best idea earlier… You grab the key under the bird pool that doubles for an ashtray outside the office/apartment of your boss, Lily. She’s a model and you were supposed to be her secretary. Keeping her on schedule, checking her mail, making her coffee, the only work left after the last clown gig blew up in your face. Jane Glum, clown-for-sale. You hate circuses, and work the old folks homes and birthday parties. Then those jobs mostly dried up, the union kicked you out, and you took work wherever you found it. Private eye on weekends, lounge singer on Tuesday nights, most days as Lily’s secretary. She was a good boss, up until you showed up for work a few hours ago and the office and everything in it was mostly gone. Next to where the phone would be is an envelope. You have a seat and open it.

You’re not fired, but Lily had to leave town in a hurry and sold your contract to another woman. The note didn’t leave too many details other than directions to a hotel, a key, and instructions after that. Looking around one last time, you grab that medicine bag. One final and last minute gig. The wig and nose you leave where the phone once was and put on you favorite hat while changing into more normal looking clothes. Locking the door, you put the key back where you found it and take a taxi to the hotel.

It’s not a nice hotel, the room is somewhere close to the top. Not a big room, but bigger that you could ever afford. You dump the clown gear on the bed and look around grabbing all the free things that’ll fit in it. The note gives instructions on how to use the toiled in the bathroom. A sequence of jiggles, turns, and twists of the toilet handle. You don’t question the instruction, just follow the sequence until toilet begins to flush, then the water shoots up in a rushing stream. The water then stops midair and begins to swirl into a vortex that begins to pull you in. You grab your hat and bag in one hand and at the last moment grab a bath towel. You know, because you’ve read the book and know how this is going to end up.

---This is an ongoing project and most of what I'll post are drafts that I'll keep playing with, editing and adding to from time to time. Essentially a diary, looking at the weird world and strange happenings of a clown... and occasional posts promoting Ann Sulu and other camgirls. Have a nice day.